1. Drive 40 minutes to the closest truck stop and pay $9 for a shower, plus get some eggs and hash browns.
2. Drive 30-35 minutes to a state park, pay a $15 camping fee and use the showers legally, or a $10 day pass and sneak in. Or pay $75 for a weekday season pass which does not cover use of showers.
3. Drive 40 minutes to the nearest city, pay $42 a month (plus a $25 registration fee) for a non-contract gym membership. This is what I want to do. It would do me good to start working out again – oh, I just remembered, my old workout clothes are buried in storage and would not fit, even if I still have them. So that’s something to figure out.
This place also has a steam room, which in the past I have used to a) warm the vocal chords before singing a gig b) warm the muscles before working out. Before I started steaming before every workout, I would inevitably injure something. (“Warmup stretches” were no protection.) After, no injuries.
4. If I find a permanent place to set up camp, I could buy a big round metal tub and use it as a bathtub – although that requires me to bring in many more gallon jugs of water. I did that last winter, when I couldn’t keep up with my water bill. For about three months I hauled 20-40 gallon jugs every 5-8 days from a water machine 20 minutes away – and then from a kind neighbor’s outdoor spigot. I could leave my dogs at home then – hauling more than a few gallons now would mean dumping my “bed” – foam, blankets, sheets, pajamas, books — at camp to make room for dogs and water.
5. Bucket baths. More accurately, big plastic bowl baths. There are gradations of this. One is the quick sponge bath of the stinky places. Or stinkiest places.
For example: Pour water into the bowl, dribble a drop of liquid soap on a wet hand, rub the armpit, rinse. Switch to the other arm. Repeat as needed. Apply salt stick deodorant.
Then there is the whole body wash. I’ll have to figure out the best way to do that while standing next to the front of the car, with the bowl and water and soap on the trunk. Thank goodness I’m “on the range” with minimal human interaction.
I want to go with option 3, supplemented as needed by option 5, but I worry about not having any money in my account on the day the gym takes out the fee. My credit union account balance is often zero.